I'll have what she's having

So one of the upstairs neighbors approaches me the other day (after this horrifying episode) and says something along the lines of he's sorry that his girlfriend is so loud and he'll try to tell her to keep it down ...

A little loud?

It was like the diner scene in When Harry Met Sally ... only with words that weren't suited for the movie's R rating.

I just kinda smiled and acted like I had no idea what he was talking about. But I wanted to say "Dude, I am (technically) old enough to be your mother. Please let's just act like this never happened and never, ever speak of it again."

They say good fences make good neighbors. I say what makes for good neighbors is pretending not to notice how loud they are, or the eight-foot-tall grass in their yard, or the fact that they deal drugs or are crazy or have dogs that bark every time a leaf falls off a tree.

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