What to do when the boss isn't a people person

Have you ever told your boss to go f*ck him- or herself?

I did once.

OK, so it was more like five times.

But in my defense, I had some very bad bosses. Very, very, bad bosses. Bosses who were, I imagine, a lot like Scott, the inconsiderate, ungrateful, untrusting boss at Blenz coffee shop.

That bastard.

There was the boss who locked me in a windowless room and made me count a cash-drawer full of pennies, nickels, and dimes over and over again because my register came out a penny or two short.

There was the boss who would reach down and touch my legs to make sure I was wearing pantyhose, as the dress code required.

Then there was the boss who used to criticize the way we responded when he asked us how we were -- we weren't effusive enough for him.

There was the boss who told me to work in the bar area one night even though I was way underage and then called me the c-word and fired me on the spot because I left to get some fresh air around midnight -- I was feeling sick from the thick haze of cigarette smoke in the bar and the nasty old men who kept trying to pinch my ass.

And there was the boss who was the very dirty cook at a certain restaurant (he often touched the food with his disgusting fingers and flicked his cigarette ashes in people's drinks) who made us all order cookies from his kid and then quit, taking our money with him.

This is why you should go to college, kids. Trust me.

[photo via beyondrobson]